
Hello everybody,
Lets discuss about a Industry owned completely and ferociously promoted by the Indian Government. No I am not talking about the Railways, a part near pune (i guess the Konkan railways) is owned by the Birlas, I am not sure about this though. Nevertheless this is not about the Railways. This is about a age old culture of giving & taking dowry(emphasis on giving first).
I have never liked history for the dates and stuff but always loved the story & reasoning behind big histories, so the big history behind this culture. From a article i read on web(you may have to google it), dowry practice actually started somewhere in middle of Europe, Spain i guess and it came to India with them(just like cockroaches came from US).
Why did dowry start? Earlier girls didn’t have a share in parents properties, so their fathers during their marriage would give them their share in form of gift/dowry and established it as a culture. Slowly, the men started to look forward to it, but why? Because, Girls dad would try to lure a GOOD GUY with all he has to offer. Now if a guy has a choice[In arranged marriage in India it is a matter of choice/options and not love before marriage] of two similar/equal girls, it is quite obvious he will chose the girl who brings in more wealth to HER OWN home. Then does it become wrong to demand all that the guy has been promised?
Definition of a GOOD GUY: (In the priority as listed below)
1. The amount of ancestral property he owns/shares (If there are multiple kids, his share will be calculated, so if a guy is all alone without brothers & sisters, he ranks v.high because there cant be any disputes)
2. His present income. (People with standard income like interest from loan given, rents for various flats or buildings are given priority because it gives the girl(read as kids, to be misguided) standard income even if she loses hubby.)
3. Number of sisters. (As they are going to take away a considerable chunk in marriage expenses and dowry, remember we are talking about India, known for its lavish weddings)
4. Habits of guy. The guy should not have any bad habits.(Only to ensure the earned money doesn’t flow out from the other end.)
5. Age of guy. Of course the younger the better. You know what this is for ;-)
6. Looks of guy.
7. Education and other qualities of guys.
Let me re-phrase the above,
1. Money!
2. Money!
3. Money!
4. Money!
5. Quality.
6. Quality.
7. Character.
So it is quite evident that the base of relationship[Marriage] as looked out by the girls side is Money!
So is it really bad if the guy expects(not demands) that the girl brings in some share to HER OWN HOME. After all he(actually even his ancestors) has/had/have been working so hard to make the guy look appealing to the girl? I am not promoting dowry but im confused about its correctness in the sense it is seen today. After all the girl demands her share from her hubby’s and his ancestral property as soon as the knot is tied. Even if you are married to a girl just for a second, she can claim maintenance from you.
To make a marriage work a guy puts his hard-work, family, money, fame on the plate & you expect the girl to just put in her hard-work [Yes I believe home-making is also a pretty demanding thing]. Isn’t it un-fair? If she brings something from her maternal home during marriage, wont it help her developing her OWN HOME? After all she is going to ask a pretty share if for some reason the marriage doesn’t work, even if it because of her own mistake.
After-all the girls side always has the option of walking out of marriage[before marriage] if they feel they are pressured. No-body is asking them to get the girl married on gun-point!
I guess that was too much of history & philosophy on dowry. Now to the basic topic again, how is the Indian government promoting this?
Do you know there are various laws like 498A, Dowry Prohibition Act, Domestic Violence Act, etc... which protect women against dowry & cruelty on women for dowry? You feel proud of India & be an Indian. Now let me tell that more than 1,18,000 women [Yes that is one lakh eighteen thousand] have been arrested under these acts in the past 3 years. I don’t have records since 1985, when some of these acts where brought into force. And did I tell this figure includes, age old grandmas(more than 75yrs old), pregnant women, sick women & children as small as 2months.
Now, How did an act that was brought to protect & EM-POWER women, lead to arrests of women, granny & new-born. I will discuss this in detail some-time later but here is the brief why. A MODERN em-powered girl, when she marries a guy, she has lot of expectations to be pampered, but if her expectations are broken or she starts having other issues, such as a extra-marital affair, a carrier oriented girl who prefers a demanding carrier rather than a hubby, she wants to get out of marriage.
Now once she has detached herself emotionally from her hubby(in many cases even children), she wants to get the maximum out of the relationship and right from the start she has been taught to give priority to money. Now how would you get maximum booty in you hands, if you ask simply or if you have the person on gun-point? Now this where our law-makers & law-enforcers jump in.
EM-POWERED/ARMED with the above said laws(used as guns), the girl with the help of Women Comission & Police make the guy & his family, including grannys, carrying/expecting/pregnant mothers & new-borns land-up in Jail, where they are ill-treated, beaten, starved. This emotionally broken family in an attempt to get the members out of jail are asked to chunk a maximum of their property, that too in cash! Remember the girl has been within the family, so she now has pretty good info about the total holdings of the family. No doubt the police & women-commission have a good share in this deal. No, No it doesn’t end here, the law-makers are not that stupid, they wont let the police take all of that, they have made these offenses non-compoundable, that is a complaint cant be withdrawn in police station, it has to be done only through court. Bingo! now the court also gets its share of bite in the Apple! :-) It doesn’t end still, the girl will still maintain regular/monthly maintenance even if the girl is earning handsomely and the guy has lost his job because his boss already decides the guy to be a culprit, The society reacts sharply to such incidences and v.sharply to arrests. Even if the arrest doesn’t hold ground, you cant explain it to everyone that your arrest has no ground.
You are saying, this cant be as simple as I say it to be. Of course it is not that simple, the girl has to go up to the police station/women cell/commission, bring in a few tears(even if with glycerin doesn’t matter) and tell that she was harassed by her husband and in-laws for dowry. No, she doesn’t have to give it even in writing :-) See how much she has to work.
Alright, this must be happening but its all a exception and not general. Well do you know how big a Industry is this, as per a un-official survey this is almost a 5324crore per year] industry. That’s just your pocket money right!
No girl would destroy her life by going to the police & courts, what would she get? This cant be accepted and is completely base-less. Answer to this is, the girl gets a very good chunk of property from the guy along with regular/monthly income. She secures her future. Of all the cases file till now under these crimes/laws only 2% of men have been proven guilty. Now you judge if all that I have said above is base-less.
So you see we have here a home-grown industry which is giving employment to lakhs of people jobs in the form of lawyers, judges, court staff, advisers, counselors etc... No we cant take into count the number of people ending up job-less because of these laws, they are not job-less coz of these laws but coz of their own crimes[The crime of marrying the wrong girl].
Also the wide customer base any Indian women, married to any guy living in any part of the world can be hit under this laws. Also any women married to a Indian guy can use these laws. Wow the customer base is there in every house-hold in India and even out-side India. The coverage is right from the metros to the most down-trodden village, which would have no access to other government facilities but is EM-POWERED.
This is a Industry which is growing exponentially by over 100% every year, no the recession has not hit it back but has pushed it up. You analyse and tell me how!
All the figures above area almost correct. people who want to compare/ensure them can contact me for clarification.
Kris!
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It is just misused by few who knows how to make profits out of their broken relationship.